In today’s society, there are more single-parent families than there ever were before. Reams have been written on the possible reasons why, ranging from sky-rocketing divorce rates to marriage in general becoming less of an important factor for starting a family. The main concern this raises is that many children are growing up without any experience of the traditional nuclear household, which can cause disaster for their own future family units when they grow up.
Many single moms do not choose to be alone, and when their children were born they thought that they were in a stable marriage or loving partnership. They are therefore left with many choices and dilemmas ahead of them, especially if their ex is still involved in their children’s lives and if the friction between them filters down to their children.
So what are the best suggestions for any busy single mom looking to create a warm and loving home for her children?
- Give your children the best sense of family you can. This means spending time with your children if you are able to when you come home from work and they get in from school. Help them to do their homework. Eat supper with them – you could even involve them in the cooking. Don’t leave it to babysitters to bathe them and put them to bed. Be there for them as much as you can. You are their mom and the mainstay of their lives.
- Take your children out on family outings. These don’t need to be expensive at all. A trip out for pizza, to a park, or just browsing around a shopping mall together may be enough. The feeling that you are doing things together will create unity and warmth.
- Get involved with two-parent families. If you and your kids are sometimes invited round, your children will get to see families where there are two parents and are happy, and they will see that this kind of relationship does actually work.
- Make your house feel like a warm home. Do your best (though it’s very hard) to keep your house tidy and comfortable. Your children can also be involved in the choice of various accessories, such as new area rugs for the house, kids rugs for their rooms, new dishes, and towels, choosing the colors and designs (within your budget, of course!). This will give them a sense of loyalty and belonging to the home that you have
created and will also provide them with a much-needed sense of stability and security.
Some of these options may seem difficult, especially if you are working out of the home and your child spends extra time in daycare or with babysitters. In that case, you have to work with the hours that you have at your disposal and create quality time with your children. Even if you only see your children at bedtime and first thing in the morning, that goodnight kiss and being greeted by your smiling face on waking up may make all the difference to their emotional well being.
